If we offer a prayer, we have offered a desire for things hoped for, be it help for ourselves, gratitude, the expression of which we hope will be well received, or blessings for others. We all hope, but "evidence of things not seen" is a little tricky. Most everyone wants tangible proof of something before accepting its reality. I believe in atoms, even though I've never seen one. Is that faith? I believe my children love me. Their actions seem to indicate they do, but they could be pretending. How can I quantify love? Do actions prove love? Is love faith or taken on faith? These are all things I have contemplated over the years.
In June, 1963, if the reader has read my conversion story in this blog, it is obvious I had a spiritual experience. It was mine alone. It was not seen, but only felt. It was very powerful. I didn't know it was coming. I had prayed for knowledge, but didn't really anticipate anything too unusual. It was a manifestation of faith and spirit. With the experience I've just described, the foundation for the rest of my life was set. I knew I was supposed to leave my hometown and as I made plans to do so many "coincidences" occurred to help that happen. In August, 1963, I left Modesto and went to Provo, Utah with $200 in my pocket expecting to make my way. And I did, with a lot of unexpected help. I just knew it was the right thing to do. The way opened before me like the parting of the Red Sea. All obstacles disappeared. An unseen hand was guiding me.
But nothing of what happened to me was seen. It was all just "coincidence." There have been many times "coincidences" aligned to help me and my family. It just happened often when least expected.
I believe in God. I believe God has a plan for each person on this Earth. While God has these plans, we, free to choose, usually mess it up through pride, jealousy and hate. For as much good as I've experienced, I've also messed up my share (I'll write on repentance another time.). I don't know what the plan is for someone else, I just know what it is for me. I wish everyone would follow my plan, as it has brought me much joy. That is not mine to judge. Each of us must find out own way.
Three of my children, as well as two children by marriages, have distinguished themselves. In our family we have three outstanding moms, a financial officer, a college professor and a government relations specialist. We have eight grandchildren, all of whom are bright and get good grades. One is in Guatemala on a mission trying to make life better for the people there. I was a teacher and counselor in the public schools for 32 years and my wife, Brenda, taught for 12 years. An old saying says, "It's not bragging if it's fact." I am not trying to set myself up as special. I am trying to demonstrate that the course that was set for me in 1963 has given good fruit, with a lot of help form others.
Is the result of my imperfect faith not seen? Are the experiences I went through not real? Are my faltering steps in faith just my imagination? No, a thousand times no. Faith is real. It requires commitment and work, but brings great blessings. I am not unique! Others can be guided as I have. As Christ said, it takes faith as a mustard seed.
This poem by French poet Guilliame Apollinaire sums up faith for me.
Come to the edge, he said.
We are afraid, they said.
Come to the edge, he said.
They came to the edge,
He pushed them and they flew.
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